Your husband likely has a stronger sexual drive than you. That’s because he is made that way! The part of his brain that involves sexual stimulation is 2.5 times larger than yours. Because we women have brains that allow us to multi-task more effectively, we tend to have difficulty setting aside our other responsibilities to focus on sexual engagement.
Respect is huge for guys. Studies show it’s bigger than even feeling loved. Just as he desires to be esteemed in his work setting, so your husband longs to be a competent husband. Any show of disrespect, causes him to feel put down and inadequate. When you ignore, discount, compare, correct, ridicule or demean your husband, he is hurt to the core. If he is angry or reactive, nine times out of ten, it’s likely due to feeling some level of disrespect.
Your husband needs to know he’s making a good difference in your life. Words of affirmation are huge. It’s hard for us, as women, to understand our husband’s need for this validation. We tend to view this need as a weakness or defect. In reality, it is simply how he is wired.
As women, we’re multi-taskers. Lots of things and people clamor for our attention. We do, however, have limited bandwidth. We can’t be all things to all people. To get it all done, we often put our husbands on the back burner. When kids are young, we may think that their needs are more urgent and those of our husband can wait.